Leap of faith

I sit here and think of all the times I've taken a chance, a risk and not many instances come to mind. I wonder why as I always have been unconventional, unrestrained by norms. I've hated boundaries and have hardly ever stuck to them. Why then have I hardly taken the plunge?


It could perhaps be because I've hardly ever had someone take a chance on me. I've had to work for everything, never got anything for free. I may have had some success in overcoming obstacles, but I still have earned every ounce of my achievement. Success in your professional life has very little to do with success in your personal life and vice versa. I consider myself to be quite successful when it comes to my career. However, on the personal front, not so much. I guess I put too much of myself into work and don't play enough. Most of my risks have been in my professional life and they've worked out. On the other hand, I treat my personal life with caution. The few times I've taken a risk in that department, I've been snubbed. Now, I'm totally out of my comfort zone if I'm asked to take a risk. Recently I took one which didn't work out too well for me. Question is, should I stop while I'm ahead or throw caution to the wind? I'm waiting for someone to take that leap of faith for me, before I jump.

Breaking Point

Worlds colliding
Pulling me apart,
No common ground left.
Always drifting, 
Always searching,
I find no satisfaction 
In any zone.
Fulfillment is non-existent.
Don't know when I've reached a summit
Don't know when to stop.


I don't like complicated.
I'm persistent 
In reaching my goals.
Every goal now seems contradictory,
Every voice seems critical.
Never having cared for approval
In the past,
This feeling, I can't handle.
Tired of fighting
Now hear me scream.

I want to break free

Lately life seems to be at a standstill. My friends are growing up, doing the responsible adult things, getting engaged or married, having babies, buying properties etc. I, on the other hand, seem to be regressing back into my teenage years. I still cringe at the thought of husbands, babies, basically any sort of commitment. The only thing I want to plan for is my weekend! In retrospect, I'm glad that this is the only thing I need to plan for at this stage. Even though the monotony can sometimes be a drainer, that definitely is the lesser evil.

Someone recently said to me that women yearn for drama in their lives, and when we don't get enough of it, we create a situation where drama is inevitable. I disagree. I believe women have too many things on their mind, hence we don't need to create a situation. Drama, may simply arise as a direct consequence of us multi-tasking and the rest of the world ( AKA our male counterparts )not being able to keep up with our pace. Then of course, it was a man who claimed women crave drama!

For now, all I want is to live without the pressures of responsibilities and expectations, to explore avenues without being constricted, all I want is sweet freedom.